Wellness today…. our thoughts, feelings and actions…

Kia Ora dear all ,

In the work that I do everyday, I work with a number of adults and children who are caught in the grips of sadness , anger or fear and who struggle in making safe choices that bring out the best for themselves .

The intention for today`s writing is to highlight “the inherent connect” between what we think -what we feel and what we do…..

The thoughts we choose to filter into our headspace – influences our feelings and then our actions…..There are times when everything happens to be in zen mode …… and we think happy – we feel happy – during those times our actions always demonstrate our inner state of mind.

However there are lots of other moments when we are quick to feel unhappy – the triggers for those feelings could range from myriad reasons- someone not letting us pass on the road , -a message that has upset us – or not being able to pay the bills or someone being unwell or not being able to buy what we want or perhaps need. So what happens when we feel sad. angry or fearful;-we lose our capacity to think and to rationalise – and then sadly that impacts on our actions …..

So what can we do to make the shift towards an improvement in our feelings of sadness, anger or fear ….

We can always change the thought – by asking ourselves -what about this is making me sad or angry or fearful

What can I do about this ???

What is the purpose here for these feelings and what can I do about this?

When feeling displaced…. Name your feeling – sad or angry or fearful or any other feeling that relates to these tricky feelings-

Take ownership of that feeling

Make a plan to bring yourself to a better place

Write it down – have a focused intention on what you are going to do – how and why

I have always been in situations that get me easily feeling displaced- and when I begin to make a plan – I notice a shift in the quality of my feelings . Instead of being caught in a tricky feeling I find myself being engaged in thinking constructively and my actions resonate with all that is light – positive and happy . Yayyyy what a relief …… !!!

Lets start with replacing a low mood thought with a light hearted one – do it with intention .

“Things change when you change the way you look at things”….. Dyer

This comes with practice – yet it can be mastered over time and can be done in various ways . Here are some strategies for replacing sad or angry or fearful thoughts …- with light – safe and happy thoughts

Think of something that lights you up

Choose your words carefully when you are feeling displaced – harsh words make us feel more angry and disconnected so replace a harsh word with a gentler or kind one – this is tricky – but it can be achieved with perseverance

Focus on writing a thank you note to someone – a friend or a family member

Watch a movie that makes you laugh or makes you feel safe

Take yourself for a walk- move – movement brings flow and balance to our thinking – movement is healthy for our body and also for our brain – which means we gain more focus and we can become more productive

Sit down and allocate time for breathwork – 10 min of breathwork each day makes our brain incredibly healthy and tunes us to becoming adaptable better version of ourselves

Read for 10 minutes atleast each day – read aloud if that helps – but please do read

As you think so you become …….Wayne Dyer again ๐Ÿ™‚

Finishing todays post with inspiration from Don Miguel Ruiz`s The Four Agreements:

1.Be impeccable with your word

2. Don`t take anything personally

3. Don`t make assumptions

4. Always do your best

With much love and wishes for a safe week,

R

P.S I will illustrate the connect between- thoughts – feelings and actions – in a later blog

Wellness and pain…

Greetings to you all

Hope you are taking note of the colours of autumn- this is for those living in the Southern Hemisphere…. for those in the Northern Hemisphere – sending you my kind thoughts for a safe summer .

A catch up …… So letโ€™s talk about pain ….

The intention for today`s writing is elaborating on pain – both emotional and physical pain. Knowing about pain – a little insight into the science of pain….. the pathways of pain keeps us better equipped with the challenges and barriers that present with pain.

A pic called Faith ๐Ÿ€

Here are some key points:

The person experiencing pain – be it physical or emotional is the best judge of the extent of the pain .

The impact of the pain -depends on each person`s threshold to withstand pain. What might not seem challenging for some may be the "last straw on the camel`s back for others.”

Validation – being seen and heard …. key to wellbeing

Validating the individual`s experience of pain – is key to wellness – Endurance to pain comes whenever challenging experiences are validated

What happens when we feel pain – the neurons carry messages to the brain and the brain in response recognises the message – and then sends it back to where the pain was felt first….

Acceptance of the pain increases our resilience against feeling the intensity of the pain. Research suggests that acceptance allows us to engage through the challenge with better composure.

Too different ๐ŸฆŠ๐Ÿ˜Ž

Acceptance allows for state of calm/ composure ; Composure sets the way for readiness to self- manage …. with improved receptivity to build on skills that help with management of pain

Emotional wellness

Here are some ways that might help with pain

  • Make time to practise timed breathing every day
  • Find time to enjoy nature
  • Read literature on pain – knowledge informs
  • Have intention for each of the tasks that you engage with each day
  • Intention can be transformative – when we engage in each task with intention – we develop a sense of connectedness to who we are – what we do -and what really matters…challenges then become easier … barriers seem less daunting
  • Take mini breaks to do things that make you smile
  • Make time to move ( those with emotional pain) – and for those with physical pain-move in consultation with specialists who help with your localised pain ๐Ÿ™‚
  • Write / share your experience on pain – feel empowered – support those experiencing varying levels of pain
  • Practice compassion towards yourself and others
  • Be in the midst of experiences and people who bring kindness , joy and warmth….

Kindness Joy and Warmth ๐ŸŒŸ

Healing factor in gratitude

Morena to you all … the intention of todayโ€™s post is to elaborate on the calming and healing effects of gratitude . In our everyday living / lives there are many a times that we are confronted with emotional and / or physical pain.

Both Evidence Based Research and the teachings of philosophers from all schools of thought recommend – embracing gratitude in our lives offers a pathway towards healing / betterment abd wellness .

Gratitude is an inherent value of mindfulness – when we feel grateful we invite calmness – calmness has a regulating effect on our mind abd body – we think better – we feel better and we do better – when we are calm

Gratitude helps us become aware of our strengths hence – it allows for empowerment despite the challenges that we face emotionally or physically

Gratitude is about feeling grateful and thankful – it replaces emotional discontent with wellness and replenishment

Gratitude is about acknowledging that there are positive aspects in our lives – the positive aspects co exist with the negatives – focusing on the positives brings us to a place of contentment and paves the way for betterment

So here are ways to practise everyday gratitude

– Get a little note book – and write down either 1 or 3 things that make you smile . ๐Ÿ˜Š

– If writing is difficult draw little pictures that bring you a smile ๐Ÿ›ถ……๐ŸŽถ…..๐ŸŒบ

– Use the words – โ€œI am grateful for when you speak to your family , friends and the people you meet …. you will begin to notice the changes it brings ๐Ÿ™โค๏ธ

– Make time everyday to think of places and moments that bring you smiles and contentment ….๐Ÿ€

-Be in the midst of nature – give in to the calm ๐ŸŒบ๐ŸŒŸโ˜˜๏ธ๐ŸŒณ๐ŸŒธ๐ŸŒผ๐Ÿ„๐Ÿชด๐ŸŽ‹๐Ÿชด

Be in the company or kind and caring folks – savour every moment ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฝโœ‹๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿค—

-For those who have pets – enjoy the wellness that comes in caring for them – ๐ŸฆŠ๐Ÿธ๐Ÿ the unconditional love of dogs gift you with an experience that is priceless and transformative ….. ๐Ÿถโค๏ธ๐ŸŽถ

And on this note …. I say bye for now with much love and gratitude in being able to check in with you yet again ๐Ÿ˜Š โค๏ธ

Wellness…that comes with Trust and Patience

Dearest Readers ,

Hope you are keeping safe and well. Lets talk Trust and Patience today…..

On a personal note I had a wedding in my whanau -it was my brother`s- and my boys and I could only be with them in spirit .However the challenges of the times and stark simplicity of the event – also reminded me of the poignance of Trust and Patience – core values of mindfulnessand the difference these values make to our everyday wellness.

The intention for today`s writing is to

  1. Reinforce the depth of wisdom that comes in knowing to inculcate Trust and Patience in all that we do….
  2. Highlight the richness that these two values bring in to our Everyday Wellness.

We are living in times – where we do not know for sure – when things will ever return to normalcy…..

There are many of us who live far away from family and some of us have been impacted by the the throngs of the pandemic in myriads of ways….. The impact can leave us feeling displaced – disconnected and maybe even feel sorrowful. This can further lead to low feelings that take its`toll on our immune system .

Trust is believing that there is light at the end of the tunnel-

Patience is about learning to wait -it is also about acceptance – and being connected to the now –

So what are ways that we can emanate Trust and Patience in challenging times

Here are a few:

Find something positive in our immediate context – no matter how dark and grim it feels

Engage in simple acts of kindness and notice the way your spirits sour…..

Be in the midst of nature – each day

Be in the company of wise , kind , intelligent and fun people – who make you laugh and think

Learn a skill – crochet , music or pottery – or whatever that takes your fancy

Smile heaps ……

When we do the aforesaid …..subtle changes happen within our brainworks – and makes a positive shift in the way we think – we feel and engage

  • Our brainstem – gets unsettled when we are anxious….. – when we believe things will go well and when we are happy to wait in the moment – our brainstem – feels settled/ regulated and our thinking improves

  • Whenever our brainstem is settled / regulated – our focus improves
  • When our focus improves – we make better choices -and we blossom into resilient beings…..

With much much love

Wellness for 6th of April – a life well-lived

To my dear readers – hope you are enjoying the cool autumn air i.e.,if you are living in the Southern Hemisphere – and for those of you bracing the summer months …I hope you are doing all that is needed to keep cool …

Today I said good-bye to an educator -a colleague – friend – a leader – one of the finest human beings – so kind- so bright and so beautiful. Today was about remembering the goodness and generosity of spirit she emanated and we remembered all the things that mattered to my dear friend. All of the things that mattered to her was about nature, children , family, pets , learning, fun , and lots of love ……. Her spirit, the messages , the aura and grace in the gathering today resonated with the ethos of the profound Maori whakatauki – he tangata , he tangata , he tangata – it translates as it is the people , the people , the people

KINDNESS : Every single person at my friend`s memorial day spoke of the kindness and the warmth she radiated in the manner she connected with everyone. She had the most brilliant sparkle in her eyes that touched every single person she connected …

GRATITUDE : What also struck me was she had a special message for those at her gathering – and that was about thanking our mums and caregivers – in a world where we are quick to cast the blame on either our lineage or our upbringing – my friend`s message sounded cool , inclusive , forgiving and refreshing…

PRESENT AND CONNECTED : She wanted to be remembered for the simple joyous things that bring a smile in our hearts – like rain drops , little chooks , puppies , children , stories , songs and stars…..

The intention of elaborating on today was to share the spirit of joy , kindness and love that comes from a life so well lived!!!

So now to put that into practice:

  • So my dear readers make a note to practise kindness to yourself – to someone you know or to a passerby. You can emanate kindness by giving of your time, giving a smile or offering a gentle word . This does wonders for physical health and emotional health
  • At the end of each day give thanks to what made you smile or what brought you a light moment – it could even be a hot cup of tea or a meal that was truly nourishing – this adds dollops of wellness to our lives
  • Please take a moment to connect to be present watch the sun glisten through the clouds, the chirping of the birds, the flowering of the fruit trees , the sound of the windchimes, the waves and the sea- this helps us take notice of what really matters – and motivates to give back to the Universe that always has so much to offer!!!

My dear friend will be cherished and remembered for all of the things that she emanated right through her sixty one years…..seems too short a life span for someone so remarkable. As the service came to a close -a most delightful tui turned up to affirm – my friend`s legacy – love for learning – for humanity – for education – of connecting to everyone with warmth , love and radiance will always be in the midst of each of us now and forever ….

Arohanui

You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give -Kahlil Gibran

Wellness – using skills to self manage :)

Greetings to you all on one of the finest of Saturdays in the month of March…..

“The best way to cheer yourself is to cheer someone else up”- Mark Twain

The sun was at it`s brightest in the city of sails- we had blue skies , cool air and a lot of warmth – hope the day for each of you is going well ….. hmmm it is all very well when things flow and we feel the zennnn in all that we do !!

However there are times and days when everything feels off- beat and we feel a sense of restlessness and unease – which permeates into our being and sadly impacts on each of our outcomes – immediate and long term ones.

So the intention of today`s writing is

A. To share some truths about using brain science -sharing some home truths of how our brain is structured – knowing these truths can help make a difference of how we think, feel and do life mindfully

  • The brain is like a four layered tool box
  • Each layer has a function or a role
  • The bottom part of the brain is known as the brain stem
  • The brainstem feels unsettled when we feel sadness, fear or anger
  • The top part of the brain is known as the cortical region – looks after our learning and thinking
  • When our brainstem feels unsettled – we cannot think well, feel well or do well

B. To reiterate the power of affirmations – the power they have in making us think better , feel better and do better:)

So here the the 5 aspects of why affirmations work….

  • The primary need of the brain stem is to feel safe – brain stem is known as the primitive brain
  • When we use affirmations , we fulfill the brain stem`s need to feel safe
  • When we feel calm and safe , the brain stem is in a happy calm regulated state
  • When the brain stem is happy, calm and and regulated – the brain stem releases the “feel good hormones”
  • When the “feel good hormones” are released we can focus – and function effectively – feel better, think better and do better!!

“Nothing can bring peace but yourself” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

With much aroha from beautiful NZ

Wellness ….that comes from being mindful :)

Kia Ora to you all from the land of long white cloud , hope the week and the month of March has started well. In today`s blog I wish to elaborate on the benefits of being mindful. Mindfulness is an inherent wisdom that has always been here – however we as humans have to shout a huge thank you to Jon Kabat- Zinn founder – Stress Reduction Clinic and the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine. His ardent work in this field affirms the physiological and psychological benefits of mindfulness.

Beginnings….. โค๏ธ

There is a story behind my rationale for having chosen this topic. I was participant to a dialogue and very soon it became obvious that this was no dialogue – it involved one person talking in a loud and impassioned voice…. What helped me here – was stepping back.

Letโ€™s make music Picasso way ๐Ÿ˜Ž

We have all at some point in our lives experienced contexts that are incredibly challenging. Being mindful helps us to 1. Take a step back – -……… and when we do take a step back

Card from cafe KINDโค๏ธ

2. We also create a space that feels safe .

In that safe space we create an opportunity for ourselves to connect within- to the present moment and focus

To gain insight and develop an awareness -of what really matters…

Most beautiful Giraffe ๐ŸŒŸ

So this practice of mindfulness cannot just happen overnight – we need to make the time to excercise our brains or our minds in learning to be still .

What are ways that we can inculcate the habit of mindfulness

To cherish ๐ŸŒŸ
  • Practice Breathing – Take the time to be still and watch / hear your breath
  • Taking notice of your breath – practising breathing – is about informing ourselves that everything is ok
  • We can practise breathing – when we sit , when we take a walk –
  • So, let`s just focus on our breaths and take in more of the good ๐Ÿ˜Š
Path made clear โค๏ธ

What are some of the other benefits of practising mindfulness- this is an excercise that

  • Improves focus
  • Nourishes the brain ( Refer to my earlier writing on brain and wellness ๐Ÿ™‚
  • Improves our ability to learn
  • Reduces stress
  • Helps us to take better care of ourselves
  • Reduces some of the risks that comes from being impulsive
  • Makes us more thoughtful
  • Makes us kind and wise
  • Adds purpose and intent to our lives
  • Allows us to think before we speak
  • Increase the feeling of physical and emotional wellness
Everyday skills ๐Ÿ˜Š

So do make the time today to take a break – tune in ….. and make mindfulness an everyday practice .. and enjoy all of the nourishing and the wisdom that comes with it …..

Mindful crafting ๐Ÿ˜‰

” Mindfulness is about love and loving life – when you cultivate this love , it gives you clarity and compassion for life , and your actions happen in accordance with that.”- Jon Kabat- Zinn

Wellness – is choosing a script that works for you๐ŸŒŸ

A very good afternoon to you all …. the topic for today`s writing inspired from a book called “Aroha” that I am currently reading . The book is written by Dr. Hinemoa Elder an eminent psychiatrist and an advocate for mental wellness from beautiful Aotearoa. The author talks at length about the ancient wisdom that remains an inherent aspect of Maoridom – in choosing a whakatauki – a Maori proverb that works for each of us…..๐ŸŒŸ

Love for green ๐Ÿ€

This is mine : A whakatauki that I use in both my personal and professional realm-“aha koa iti he pounamu “- which translates as although you are small , you special like a green stone- which refers to acknowledging each of the strengths and oddities that makes us who we are….โค๏ธ

A card from KIND cafe๐ŸŒŸ

The book Aroha resonates with my earlier writings on how words and language are powerful tools in the way we inform and educate ourselves on the ethos of how we aspire to live …..it takes into account the choices we make and the responses we choose at various circumstances of our lives.

Thiruvalluvar ๐ŸŒŸ

Thiruvalluvar of Tamil literature wrote Thirukurall – each very short and succinct verse that emanates the wisdom that comes with defining values with affirming words ; words that have the power to create positive thoughts , feelings and actions…. words that set the trajectory of our lives. ๐ŸŒŸ๐Ÿ€

The year has started well and yet I feel an element of grim sadness as I write knowing my mother is having a particularly difficult time with her health. The sadness comes from not being able to be there with my family in India and learning to accept the looming uncertainty that comes with the current times. I take some comfort in knowing that my mother is supported in best of comfort, that she is with family and is able to have access to specialist medical care that will hopefully bring her reprieve that she so richly deserves.

๐ŸŒŸFor better health and wellness โค๏ธ

I have a choice to either hold on to the gripping sadness or make a sincere effort to stay positive. I am choosing to stay connected with my family and friends both sides of the globe .

I also make a conscious note that I am in a country that is now my home-and continue to thrive in the comfort of interactions with my adult sons and extended whanau . I am exceptionally grateful for the “connect” I have with friends some of who also feel like family here. I am incredibly grateful that this book called Aroha was lent to me with spontaneity by a dear colleague ๐Ÿ“š

๐Ÿ™Space that emanates peace โ˜€๏ธ

The intention of highlighting some of the words in the above paragraph is to reiterate the power of affirmation that comes with using words/ vocabulary that resonates with comfort , kindness and love.

Using such words helps to create a belief system that is founded on positive thoughts .

Reinforcing positive thoughts facilitates a pathway towards making a conscious choice of choosing a response that is positive – light and affirming.

I set about in the beginning of 2020 and made a few lines that I call my personalised script …For those of you reading this blog , I make a request to have a play with words and make a personalised script that sets the pace and tone for this year….light filled – fun – and affirming

โค๏ธSharing here – My personalised script ๐Ÿ˜Š

“That best portion of a good man`s life , His little, nameless, unremembered acts ,Of kindness and love” William Wordsworth

With much love ,

โ˜€๏ธWellness in the New Year…โ˜€๏ธ

Kia Ora my dear readers ,

Greetings to you all from the Southern Hemisphere โ˜€๏ธThe year has begun with plentiful sunshine and the air is warm and filled with light and hope . I pondered a bit on what to write about for my first blog for this year .

A slice of Heaven –
Taken on the day this year began โค๏ธ

Kindness is something that we spoke about a lot in the past year – and along with kindness comes forgiveness . I choose to write on forgiveness as it is an inherent aspect of healing and wellness .I am still learning about this principle – and as I begin to see the light of this incredible virtue I thought it would be apt to share this light abd learning with you all โ˜€๏ธ

โค๏ธOver cups of tea with my adult sons – my whanau here in Aotearoa ๐Ÿ€

All of us at some point would have experienced varying levels of betrayals – and what really helps to move past the blows that some of our fellow humans throw at us – is choosing to forgive.

St .Francis of Assisi -โ€œ it is in pardoning that we are pardoned …..๐Ÿ€

An amazing book that I read by T.D.Jakes speaks beautifully on forgiveness .and writes โ€œforgiveness is a gift to yourself.โ€

Picture called Grace

Here are 5 key points

Forgiveness is a choice that we can make to help with our own healing ๐Ÿ€

Forgiveness liberates us from feeling burdened – we donโ€™t have to remain a hostage of the past ๐Ÿ›ถ

When we make that choice we create a journey that is free of bitterness and resentment ๐Ÿ˜Š

Forgiveness is about removing negative perceptions of the past and connecting to everyone with kindness ๐Ÿ€

Forgiveness is a virtue that connects with the present and allows for kindness peace and love. โค๏ธ

Vishnu

โ€œ if you want to see the brave , look to those who can forgive.โ€- The Gita

So hereโ€™s to a very affirming beginning for us all โ˜€๏ธโ˜€๏ธโ˜€๏ธโ˜€๏ธโ˜€๏ธโค๏ธ

With much aroha โค๏ธ

Pohutukawa time again โ˜€๏ธ

Wellness -for the now

๐Ÿ€Stay Connected โค๏ธ

My dear readers,

As we head towards the new year amidst the buzz of the festive spirit, I write again to touch base with each of you to review the year in the context of wellness and connectedness. This year has been much about the pandemic โ€“ and much more about the lessons learnt during what has been a year of crisis for so many of us.

โค๏ธ- Pohutukawa – a season to celebrate from Southern Hemisphere โ˜€๏ธ

Ironically COVID has emphasised connectedness in more ways than one โ€“ COIVID touched all of humanity -regardless of class, gender and race. We also got to learn new ways of keeping busy- having purpose – and living well โ€“working from home has been the norm and long distance travel almost a thing of the past.

About a book called SPARK๐Ÿ˜‰

How did we stay connected? What helped โ€ฆ.

  • Taking time to Excercise
  • Practising kindness
  • Taking time to reflect
  • Spending time with nature
  • Being able to ask โ€“ what am I to learn from this
  • Refraining from blame
  • Reaching out to those who struggled
  • Learning to reach out and ask for help
  • Showing acts of kindness and love in small and big ways
  • Supporting home grown talent and
  • Being grateful โ€“ taking in all the positives and
  • Having Faith โ€“ that this too shall passโ€ฆ.
๐Ÿ€Authorโ€™s Illustrations on brain works ๐ŸŒŸ

All of the aforesaid comes from loving more โ€ฆ..and living in the nowโ€ฆ..”Anyone can live sweetly, patiently , lovingly , purely till the sun goes down. And this is all that life really means .”- Robert Louis Stevenson”

So Let our New Year be all about loving more and living in the now ๐Ÿ˜Š

๐ŸŒŸPicture story of resilience ๐ŸŒŸ๐Ÿ‘

“Tomorrow is a new day , you shall begin it well and serenely”.- Ralph Waldo Emerson

With much love

โ˜€๏ธCoherence ๐Ÿ€
๐ŸŒŸUnity in diversity โค๏ธ
๐ŸŒŸShamrock – symbol of faith โค๏ธ