Live 💛 – Love 🍀 Serve 🤲

16 Dec 2025

To my  dear readers ,

The month of December is rolling on with a hectic pace.  I am grateful and delighted to check in and share with you some insights on Emotional Intelligence 

Rationale for choice of topic : 

The core function of our brain is relational ;emotional intelligence is the potential that each of us have to tune into ourselves to bring out the best version of ourselves and then to have and make a positive outcome  on the numerous connections we make in our lifetime. 

Emotional intelligence and self awareness : 

Self awareness has a direct relevance to how we  manage  ourselves , our feelings  , our connections with our fellowmen, how we influence or influenced   and the actions we take.

Alternatively the actions we choose and make is a reflection of how much we are tuned into ourselves – our core needs – what’s going to work  versus what’s not going to work. 

Self awareness also allows scope for knowing what each of us want out of life …. 

Self Awareness is knowing / identifying 

What is it that I want ? 

How do I wish to get to my aspirations ?

What are the values I hold close?  and 

Ofcourse knowing 

What pushes my buttons ?! And 

What am I going to do about this … 

Management of feelings is about learning to work with the little and big feelings – knowing to navigate and manage our emotions especially  when things do not go as intended …. 

Social awareness is a component of emotional intelligence. Social Awareness is about having a sense of the other person- being able to feel what the other person is feeling -. Social awareness is about using empathy as a core value in the way we manage ourselves and relationship with those around us . 

Relationship management is all about leadership and emotional intelligence.

Having a strong  sense of social awareness also helps with relationship management , management of conflict – paves the way  for empathy , team work and then leadership. 

On that note I close with gratitude and aroha 😊

Live💛 – Love ☘️- Serve💫

28 Nov 2025

To my dear readers ,

A huge thank you to the opportunity I have had in checking in with each of you through the year ; and just as I begin my note with a vote of thanks 🙏 and light hearted cheer 😉 I set the intention for today’s post and choose to pen my thoughts on 3 actions for wellness that lean towards “half full glasses”🌞

So here goes 3 of my favourite wellness must dos 🙌

Time is the only precious commodity we have – therefore spending time doing what gives meaning or joy or contentment – adds to the wellness quotient . Offering time with those who need our presence can be transformative to the way we walk through life .

The inherent nature of time is that it remains unconquerable- Gita

Being in the present moment : the fascinating and intriguing aspect is that life throws challenges at each of us at different times – teaching ourselves to lean into the challenge , embracing acceptance and staying focused on the now – can be empowering.

Whatever the present moment contains , accept it as you had chosen it and always say yes to the present moment – Eckhart Tolle

Gratitude saying thank you to even the teeeny weeny moments that bring a smile is priceless in enhancing individual and collective wellness . Remembering to take note of the silver linings through every cloud that passes …. is not easy – yet can be done – it is impossible to hold on to resentment when we say “thank you”🤭😉….✅

Wear gratitude like a cloak and it will feed every corner of your life – Rumi

Wishing you more wellness in all that you do every day 🤗💫

October 10 , 2025

Live -Love -Serve ☘️

The intention of October’s post is to write on love – and the role of this power centric value in our wellbeing.

Love is a word and concept that is used in simple everyday language💛

We have also seen love being used in a euphoric sense 💛

So what does this love mean and why is it fundamental to everyday living -for all of us humans ☘️💛

Love reinforces basic human need for connection and belonging.
Staying connected therefore provides an avenue for meaningful interactions 😊☘️💛

Life with meaningful and loving connections fuels one with purpose ☘️
When interactions feel safe and meaningful , there is scope for lightness and joy – increase in levels of safety and wellbeing – emanates a reality that
Radiates love ❤️

Here are some avenues that help manifest love in everyday living 😊
Engage in activities that help you feel safe and calm ☘️
Be amidst those who bring in more smiles 😊😊😊😊😊
Develop an awareness of your interested and start making building blocks of experiences that is concrete ☘️
For example –
1. It can be joining a group of fund raisers
2. Walking together for 30 minutes with a friend who makes you feel safe , kind and calm
3. Aaaaaa for the priceless love of pets 🤗💛 Being with your pet -and experiencing a lightness in your manner
4. Making a nourishing meal for you or for someone else or enjoying a cup of tea with a dear friend
5. Music can also fill your cup with oodles of everyday light and joy 💛
6. The vastness of nature – the stillness of trees , tilt of the waves and the dance of flowers can also be deemed a celebration of euphoric love 💛
7. Art for some is the the essence of love
8. Quest for knowledge, and experiences that inspire go within the realm of love 💫💛
9. Devotion – time with and for the Divine has everything to do with love so I believe ☘️😌
10. Service – being of help , offering to give of your time and resources towards betterment of someone else is ofcourse love on the grandest scale 💛🎶🎼🎵💛☘️💫
11. Always honour and Give thanks to those who helped you recognise the value of 💛

I do aspire for each of you to live everyday with Love in your heart 😊💛☘️💫🎵🎼💛

” Reach high for stars lie hidden in you. Dream deep for every dream precedes the goal “- Rabindranath Tagore

And on that note
Much love and
Ma te wa

Live 💛 Love ☘️ Serve 💫

To my dear readers,

Come September and the advent of spring. There is a burst of colour in the crisp cool air – with daffodils, some orchid blooms and a hint of the first leaves of the hydrangea blooms. 

What am I going to write about this time around …. hmmmm….. Happiness – as being happy is about a choice that we make each day. Rationale for my choice of topic is ….👋

“ Happiness is a state of mind – it has nothing to do with the external world” The Gita

a.  Around the need to hold on to a positive mindset even when things do not necessarily go our way or (as it is said ….) when the ducks are not in a row …. 🦆🦆🦆

b.  As we grow older, we are bound to experience varying levels of unease either through health impediments, conflicts, minor and major feuds and loss through separation, divorce, death of a loved one….there is no escaping life`s twists and turns …. 

“While you cannot control your experiences, you can control; your explanations” Martin Seligman 

c.  What does matter is making a conscious choice towards choosing to walk lighter and being more kind to ourselves every day ☘️💛

d.  This is a necessity for our physical wellbeing and mental wellbeing. 

Therefore – In pursuit of happiness …. what are some of the paths that can be made available 

–  Counting on the positive even when things are looking bleak and dark. This is hard – yet put that in writing – and you can experience a shift in affect.

–  Taking time to appreciate that what is free – teaching ourselves to look at the sky, wonder at the flowers and feel light when noticing the breeze or the blue green hues of the sea🌊

–  Stealing a moment to demonstrate kindness to someone else – when when things are looking wry – (evidence suggests that our primitive brain relaxes when engaging in acts of kindness) – it can be buying a meal, a coffee, a pair or socks, or offering your precious time – once again keep a log …

–  Going along with the gift of exercise – walk, move to a dance, engage in gentle stretches and watch for the shift in your mood- keep a log of this too.🚶🏊‍♂️

–  Engaging in breathwork practice every day being able to inhale – hold and exhale – is transformative in mind and body wellness 🧘‍♂️

–  Making gratitude practice mandatory -write down 3 things you a thankful for each day. Write a thank you note to someone appreciating them – include the detail. Choose a new person each day – and do this for 21 days- one study reflects a clear shift in the happiness quotient when we include gratitude practice for our everyday living.💛☘️

–  When well-being comes from engaging our strengths and virtues, our lives are imbued with authenticity- Martin Seligman

–  Developing a habit to make regular social connections –and being committed to being in kind, and supportive company ; for those of us living singularly, or battling an illness this may not always be easy -however beginning to take minuscule steps in allowing kind and caring folks into our inner space…and enjoying a smile or two works wonders always ….😊🎂🍰

And on that note ,-

Ma te wa 💛💫

8 August 2025

Live 💫 Love ☘️ Serve 💛

My dear readers ,

I write this as I listen to the quiet August rain – the intention for this blog is to improve our wellness quotient through value focused living ⭐️✨☘️

So here are the dimensions that add priceless currency to how we navigate through our life experiences…✨💫

1. Faith comes from believing and knowing that things are going to be okay despite the worst of adversities . Faith is empowering in the way it leads one to take small steps of courage and to keep repeating the process .😇☘️
2. Moral Goodness is about  choosing to do the right thing even when life lures one to do otherwise – Moral goodness comes when there  is clarity around the values that makes us who we are . ☀️
3. Knowledge and wisdom : Being well informed on the richness of life through art through education through practical experience through service can be life affirming – and adds further experiences – connection that enriches our life .📚
4. Wisdom is about learning to apply life’s lessons in a way that adds joy / meaning richness in the way we lead our lives😇😊
5. Patience or the power of endurance is a value that can test the best of us – so it about stepping back , being in the moment , having faith and showing wisdom and learning to wait.💫☘️
6. Self control – or impulse control- knowing to manage our emotions is a test of our emotional intelligence and wisdom – this comes from knowledge around our strengths and weaknesses . It comes from developing an awareness of regulating our emotions through excercise , through breathwork , through art , prayer or meditative practice.🧘‍♂️🎼📖 
7. Respect is about being protective of the values ( e.g. safety , integrity , empathy)  that we hold close  for ourselves  and being able to emanate those values to those around – respect allows scope for more goodness and lightness  in all that we do.❤️🙌
8. Kindness – remembering to be kind always is about being gentle in the manner we think , feel and act – it is a reflection of light and generosity of spirit.✨⭐️

About the aforesaid values we can get to know more  from the books we read , the people we meet , the connections we  make and the experiences that happen for us at different stages of our journey . …

The core values we choose influences  the choices we make , the people we bring in to our lives and the experiences we create ….. in choosing to make our lives, light, joyous and easy✨💫☀️ it’s about knowing we are going to be ok – no matter what …☺️

“When you realize that there is nothing lacking the whole world belongs to you” – Lao Tzu

And on that note

 Ma te wa 💛☘️ 

Live☀️-Love💛-Serve💫

July 8,2025

Dear readers,  

To those of us in the Southern Hemisphere – let’s keep warm….  📚😊

The intent of today`s input is to elaborate on supports needed for our neurodiverse children, young people – fellow humans. A formal diagnosis of ASD suggests that their abilities are variably impacted within the social realm, communication realm, and emotional realm. Autism impacts on the way one is able to store ad or process information- so adequate, varied and consistent support is needed to help them communicate and regulate emotions This means that people with ASD may have different ways of learning, moving and or paying attention.  

The rationale behind my choice of topic is much of the work that I do these days is around supporting children and young people with varying levels of autism. Years ago, I accessed the SCERTS framework that was set up to help families, teachers and therapists work together (with the realms of social communication, emotional regulation and transactional support) to facilitate supports for autistic children. I found this valuable and sharing snippets of information in this forum. 

“A life of joy and happiness is possible only on the basis of knowledge and science.” – Dr. Sarvepalli Radhakrishnan 

• Social communication – this is about developing children’s relationships and communication skills. – it is about identifying avenues –using a range of resources – visual cues – verbal cues that facilitate social communication   skills. It is also about being persistent in helping those with autism with tools, with pathways where they are able to communicate and socialise – where they feel heard and seen – where they feel safe. The more we create predictability and safety – receptivity improves – and then we create a possibility – of a willingness to engage. 
• Emotional regulation – this is about helping/ learning how to manage strong emotions- evidence based research indicate that people with autism need additional resources in how they manage their emotions –by facilitating range of tools that allow them to explore sense of touch, sense of smell and taste. For some of our impacted children and young people – movement , music and breathing also brings agency in their manner of engagement.  
• Transactional support – this is about facilitating and providing helpful resources and pathways to help with communication, socialisation and learning. It is about recognizing that children and young people with autism are dependent on those around them (families, professionals, educators) to make sense of their social, communication and emotional world.  

“Autism is a way of being. It’s not something you get over. It’s part of the tapestry of who you are.” – Michelle Garcia Winner   

The intent in sharing this Kete of knowledge is around supporting individuals – families who continue to strive in accessing varied pathways of learning and wellness for their neurodivergent loved ones

Much love ☘️💫

Live🎼- Love💛-Serve ☘️

My apologies for a delay in my input …. for the month of May🙃

Since my move to Christchurch late last year – much of my time is absorbed by the demands of my current setting, my work, my pets, art , music lessons and new connections – whilst still staying actively connected to my adult sons, my whanau of origin and my dear extended whanau that also involves you all. 🎼📚

I decided to write on Change– this relates to my own experience of how change adds wellness, change definitely brings in challenges and change has the magic of making a reality that is so radically different and energizing too!!!

So- here is my note ….

On embracing change 

Change happens through conscious decision… 

Change is welcoming a trajectory of choices that are varied, potent and robust. 

The intention is always about choosing an outcome – a pathway that is transformative.

Transformative?? – How so, one may ask….🤔📚

Through change one can experience and create new realities.

New realities can then help break old beliefs and patterns of interaction. 

That no longer serve a purpose.

New realities paves for progression…📚💫🎼📖🙌

through 

Unexplored pathways,

Authentic connections 📖

Happen out of the blue 💙

Growth mindsets that reflect

The joy and light of resilience ☘️💫☀️

” We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake , not by mechanical aids but by infinite expectation of the dawn”– Henry David Thoreau

On that note 😊🎼

Much love

Live-Love-Serve

April 26, 2025

To my dear readers,

The intention for today`s post is to highlight ideas from “ Think again” – a book by Adam Grant  

Rationale for my choice is the principles of the book resonates with sound principles around using our critical thinking skills whilst simultaneously highlighting the need for emotional safety, interpersonal effectiveness and growth.

1.       The author recommends that forming an opinion or coming to a conclusion needs to be founded by evidence based data –when we have an answer that is tested with data – we then avoid the risk of falling into the category of  talking for the sake of talking….( talk to just persuade/ talk to oppose or talk to an audience…_) 

2.       Being led or defined by values – such as quest for knowledge and cognitive flexibility -this allows one to develop a mindset that paves the way for change and growth 

3.       Knowing not  to confuse confidence with competence -there are times that confidence can be a barrier for improving – there is always room for improvement – and that comes only when we persist in self discovery through  checking in on what we know, what we thought we knew and to question some of our own beliefs…  

4.       Developing the mindset to learn something new  from those we meet each day – he  recommends having a robust social network – which includes a set of people who challenge us. Constructive conflict is about being able to take in others `view point from an intellectual perspective -so learning not to take disagreements personally. 

5.       Learning to be an active listener – insights on interpersonal rethinking which includes– being a  good listener is  about allowing  the speaker to get clarity on their own views and unfold  reasons for change …. The author recommends the use of “ how” rather than “why”-for example the use of ‘ how” would facilitate the speaker to become aware of their own limitations and begin to make changes 

6.       Understanding that disagreements within any context does not need to become a battle – within disagreement the author recommends: 

• Common ground or points of convergence – which shows a willingness to negotiate  
• Bringing in too many reasons to add to the conflict – can make audience defensive  
• Reinforcing Freedom of choice in any situation allows to respect autonomy 
• Using a conversation to go  through the process instead of being caught in the frustrations of emotional outbursts.  

7.       Being aware that there are more than 2 sides to an argument – counting in other perspectives and allowing ourselves to be curious or  even confused can ultimately gives us more logical approaches towards finding a solution  

8.        Inculcating a culture where we teach  children to engage in robust discussions , where they learn to question and learn to seek feedback from others. So children get the opportunity of notion of [versatilities ad possibilities  

9.       Working on creating a culture that takes into account how processes are followed through ,where leaders model curiosity and humility – where people can ask questions , where varied options are considered and  where people can feel safe –when they think differently and  

10.    Making the processes evidence based , accountable and  meaningful; What I loved most was “Don’t be afraid to rethink” – what worked for yesterday might well lose its purpose tomorrow – the author is all ,let`s evaluate as we go instead of making a ten year plan.   

Ma te wa for now 💫

Live – Love – Serve

26 March 2025

Kia Ora to my dear readers ,

Summer has bid a fond adieu for those of us here in the Southern Hemisphere – we are heading into the cooler months and looking forward to some autumnal fun and wellness …..Of course ,the cooler months impact on one`s affect / moods, and therefore bring in the threat of aches and pains …& so I thought it was pertinent to write on pain and the impact it has on our physical and mental wellbeing.
“Awareness is the greatest agent for change.”
— Eckhart Tolle

Rationale for choice of topic: In the work I do I continue it work with young people and their families who are impacted by physical and emotional pain. Therefore it works to our advantage when we explore and understand that pain does have a significant impacts on wellness .
Definition Pain: Pain is defined as a noxious / harmful – sensory and emotional experience.

• Studies indicate that our brain responds to physical pain in the same way that we respond to a psychological / emotional pain-
• Prolonged physical pain can cause wariness, fatigue – left unattended this may also lead to anxiety and or depression.
• Varying levels of anxiety left can impact on our physiology -health and wellbeing – that may also sometimes mark the onset of pain ….
• Pain (emotional and physical pain ) eases when we make a careful choice to take time to slow down and lean into the challenge . This can be the first step towards acceptance of the challenge of pain .
• Addressing the onset of pain with input from relevant specialist support – always
• Taking note of the present moment to continue engage in activities that bring in smiles – add more joy and meaning.
• Teaching ourselves to remove the emotion out of the pain;( this means during the time one senses pain ….. ) Be aware of the pain and look at it objectively
• Be in the present – Use scripts such as
• “ I am experiencing pain and I am working on getting better
• Leave out language such as “ why me” as that is likely to bring in more doom and gloom

“As long as you are unable to access the power of the Now, every emotional pain that you experience leaves behind a residue of pain that lives on in you”.Ekhart Tolle

– Other measures of working through pain whilst staying in the present moment

• Paying attention to detail- of what you see, what you hear,
• Colours that delight you, music that brings in calm to your ears
• The presence of people who matter to you and care about you
• Making note of textures that comfort you – it might be warm blanket
• A soft petal or the lush coat of pet that you have in your midst
• Being mindful of the food you include in our diet and
• The aroma of the space that holds you …..all of the above
• Within the Present Moment
• “ Change the way you look at things , and the things you look at change” – Wayne Dyer

I am grateful for the connections and the knowledge – that I access through my life and work – hope with sincerity that today`s topic might add some value as we each move through our respective healing / wellness journeys….🎼📚☘️😊🙏

Arohanui

Live – Love -Serve ☘️

To my dear readers we are well into the month of February-  I hope this year has been good for you. The intent of my writing today is to highlight key concepts from my recent read of an amazingly well written book called the Power of regret by David Pink  

Rationale for my choice of the topic is that it resonates definitively  with the ethos of wellness. So on that note ….. 

Regret is one of the most universal common emotions that all human beings experience- regret is an integral part of how we think  and feel ; therefore regret  also has a powerful influence on our actions.  

The reflective component that comes with regret helps us in processing what has happened , where one might have erred and helps in taking ownership to the way we move forward ,- alternatively “ looking back helps us move forward” 

Regret involves using language – words to articulate an experience that is likely to have been unpleasant or painful. The more we use our words to address the regret , we are able to process and unpack the painful experience – it therefore becomes more meaningful and concrete.  

Regrets are life lessons and can be categorized into  4 core components – 

1. Foundation regret is the value we place on stability ☀️
2. Boldness regret represents the value we place on growth  💫
3. Moral regret unpacks the value we hold on being good and doing good  ⭐️🌟💫
4. Connection regret is about extending ourselves to the spirt of kindness , grace and love  💛

Reflective aspect of regret stems from an innate need to set things right –   clarifies what we value , and can be a motivator in helping us to do better in future. It helps one to identify about things that matter –how well we live our lives ,about growth , about connections, love and goodness. 

I have so loved reading this book and am so grateful to have been able to share this with you .  

Much love  

Sent with Proton Mail secure email.